The Mistakes AAPI Brides Say to Avoid on Their Wedding Days
As someone who attends a lot of weddings (and has way too many Notes lists about what to wear to each one), I'm always thinking about the details—what's appropriate, what feels celebratory, and how to show up in a way that's respectful to the couple and their culture. Lately, I've been thinking more deeply about what it really means to be a good guest when you're invited into a cultural tradition that's not your own.
With May being AAPI Heritage Month, I wanted to slow down and spend time learning about the many different traditions that exist across East, Southeast, and South Asian weddings—not just the aesthetics we often admire from afar but also the deeper layers of etiquette and meaning behind them. I started reaching out to friends, creatives, and community members from across the Asian diaspora to ask questions I genuinely wanted answers to: What's considered respectful when it comes to guest attire? Are there colors or silhouettes that hold symbolic meaning (*ahem* red)? What do gift-giving customs look like? What are the moments that matter most?
This story is the result of those generous conversations. Rather than offering a checklist of dos and don'ts, my goal is to share personal insights from people who have either gotten married within these traditions or grown up attending weddings that reflect them. Everyone I spoke to had a unique perspective shaped by their family, region, and lived experience, but a common thread ran through each answer. These celebrations carry deep cultural significance, and there's beauty in taking the time to learn the "why" behind the "what."
Whether you're attending an Asian wedding this year or simply want to be a more thoughtful guest, I hope these stories offer a deeper sense of understanding and a reminder that respect doesn't have to come at the expense of style. It just means paying attention.
Before we dive in, would you mind sharing what cultural background or country you identify with when it comes to wedding traditions?
My cultural roots are Chinese, and those traditions have always been a meaningful source of inspiration—both personally and professionally. Chinese weddings are filled with symbolism and beauty, from the intricate tea ceremonies to the palette of auspicious colors. They celebrate not only love but also legacy and community, which is something we strive to reflect in the world of Sau Lee.
Were there any specific cultural traditions you incorporated into your wedding that were especially meaningful to you?
